She’ll be Back.
We’re Number One.


  • April 19, 2020 at 12:07 am
    Too Tall

    So much art.

    So much truth.

  • April 19, 2020 at 12:18 am

    One of your best, Chris.

    • April 19, 2020 at 7:29 am


  • April 19, 2020 at 12:38 am

    Believe it or not, I had people “unfriend” me because I said Gov Abbott was showing something uncommon in politicians; common sense.

    Trump resurrected the economy once and he’ll do it again.

    Meanwhile up here in Canada, a reporter accidentally discovered Trudeau gave China $41 million in foreign aid. Wrap your head around Canada whose federal government engaged in millions of deficit spending sending money to China who are engaged in a massive buildup of their armed forces, building a space program, you name it. I’ll bet the Chinese had a great laugh when they cashed that cheque.

    • April 19, 2020 at 1:04 am

      That should be under the heading:
      “When we hang the capitalists they will sell us the rope we use.”
      Stalin/Lenin, probably a few others…

      Love this one Chris!

      • April 19, 2020 at 11:28 am

        Perhaps that should now be amended to, “…they will buy us the rope we use.”

    • April 19, 2020 at 8:14 am

      I’ve been personally “unfriended” – it seems certain people cannot tolerate hearing that Corona Apocalypse (like its twin Climate Apocalypse) serve only the Left’s destructive agenda of deceit. But to be fair, even the most TDS-infected Democrat is never going to admit they exploited a virus to try and take down the US economy.

    • April 19, 2020 at 10:43 am

      Funding “China” is bad enough. But guess who funded coronavirus studies at the two (2) Wuhan laboratories.
      According to Ted Cruz, they got a U.S. NIH grant, amid “concerns” about the facility’s security.

    • April 19, 2020 at 12:30 pm

      The liebral party is so deeply entrenched with china that there’s no seperating them.
      Even bombardier doesn’t have the influence the ccp does.
      And it’s been going on for years…look up the ‘sidewinder report’

      They don’t even try to deny it anymore, sockboy just drools a bit and then changes the subject. If he’s even in the country or not too busy flagrantly violating the quarantine ‘rules’ on the same day he threatens us for not following them.

  • April 19, 2020 at 1:08 am
    T Paul

    Women have their uses. Especially when it comes to cooking, cleaning, and changing diapers. They tell me when to cook, clean, and change diapers and I do it. If you could make a damn baby without a woman, we’d have only one gender left and the other would be hunted to extinction.

    • April 19, 2020 at 1:32 am

      Nah. They are too much fun, sometimes.

      • April 19, 2020 at 7:59 am

        That’s the problem with the Battle of the Sexes; too much fraternizing with the enemy!

        Zar Belk!

      • April 20, 2020 at 2:38 am

        And then there are all the Gammas who hope to become prisoners of war.

  • April 19, 2020 at 1:52 am

    If you could hear the lament and screams coming out of the Left and the Democrats (but I repeat myself) when It was announced that Northern Florida beaches were to be open on Friday afternoon…There are people actually wishing death to beachgoers.

  • April 19, 2020 at 2:05 am

    You are aware that the “Kool Kids……Little Girls” doesn’t refer to actual, real women?

  • April 19, 2020 at 7:27 am

    Who are the PRIME ‘Go-To’ faces for the MSM? SanFranNan and ‘The Squad’, – Chris nails another one!

    • April 19, 2020 at 8:01 am

      I have ben referring to them, and their allegedly male allies as “The Mean Girls Clique” for years.

      Zar Belk!

  • April 19, 2020 at 7:54 am

    Toxic Femininity.

  • April 19, 2020 at 7:59 am

    Wayne, let me modify: “”Trump resurrected the economy once and [we’ll] he’ll do it again.” It’s empowering to have a POTUS on OUR side.

  • April 19, 2020 at 8:14 am
    Fritz Brohn

    THIS one I’m printing and framing!

  • April 19, 2020 at 8:40 am
    Old Codger

    Ah, Chris? I’m one Texan who isn’t exactly all smiles about what our esteemed governor is doing. As part of Abbot’s program he made it mandatory to wear something over you mouth and nose whenever one is out in public. Prior to this coming week it wasn’t mandatory so I haven’t been wearing a mask. Now I have to or face potential fines/jail time. From where I sit he’s not relaxing restrictions at all.

    • April 19, 2020 at 10:45 am

      My wife didn’t mention mandatory masks, Old Codger. She doesn’t have one and has no intention of getting one. Mind you, our place is well outside of the large urban areas.

    • April 19, 2020 at 1:16 pm
      MAJ Arkay

      Not mandatory state-wide, just highly recommended.

      My mask is an old red bandana, and under my sunglasses and big brim hat, I look like a 19th century Old West bank robber. Last time I had to go to San Antonio (where mask wearing IS mandatory), no one even blinked at the sight.

      Even the San Antonio city judge that’s on the mayor’s nightly news “conference” wears an old bandana.

      I think of it as another accessory. It’s around my neck until needed, can catch sweat, block out the local limestone dust (and Lubbock when the wind’s coming from that direction), and I think it looks kinda nifty.

      • April 20, 2020 at 6:59 am

        “block out Lubbock”
        Heh. I liked living in Lubbock. As long as there were some trees or a wall around to break up the landscape. 🙂

      • April 20, 2020 at 11:33 pm
        Jefferson A Selvy

        Wasn’t there an old song that went “Happiness is Lubbock, Texas in my rearview mirror?”

  • April 19, 2020 at 10:50 am

    Back in the 80s when I was in the Navy, I remember one very salty Senior Chief making this remark about women … “Split-tails; if they didn’t have p*ssies, they would have all been extinct thousands of years ago.”

    Not my words; don’t direct your ire at me, please. But … memorable words all the same.

    • April 19, 2020 at 12:33 pm

      I had an old Chief say “if it wasn’t for sex there’d be a bounty on them”

      Again, heard it…didn’t necessarily say it…

  • April 19, 2020 at 11:25 am

    Kinda sounds like an old BurmaShave commercial- the ones on the side of the road:

    We built

    We will
    Do it

  • April 19, 2020 at 11:45 am

    Marx was merely appealing to his entitled, female-chauvinist-side.

  • April 19, 2020 at 1:25 pm
    MAJ Arkay

    Jeez, what’s with all the male chauvinist crap in the comments today? Y’all wake up on the wrong side of the bed again? Cabin fever gettin’ to you? Did you just decide today’s the day to be a complete poophead?

    Trashing all women (and yes, that’s exactly what your comments do) is completely uncalled for. All the Mean Girls in the world do not outnumber those who are not mean.

    Trash the Mean Girls, definitely. They deserve and need it. But your “salty Senior Chief” is obsolete, and it’s long past time to LET! IT! GO!

    Just remember who’s the most deadly here in Chris’ wonderful comic… You have the guts to declare Sam a “Mean Girl?” How about Pamela? Or me?

    [stomps off in disgust to clean weapons]

    • April 19, 2020 at 3:54 pm

      Ladies, pardon our glance to yesteryear when (we supposed) men were men and gals were dates.

    • April 19, 2020 at 4:33 pm

      MAJ, of course all females are not Mean Girls and all males are not the Barnacle Chief, but some are. Likely many of each are due to dysfunctionality as Real Men and Women. So they turn to hate and attack to cover their own hurt and rejection.

      Careful not to complain too loud about these old anecdotes, this is a place of advanced logic, reason, and real world experience, and that is what makes the toon resonate.

      Also threats and challenges are misplaced here, none of us with the occasional pissant exception that Chris quickly zaps, are either Mean Girls or crusty old closet homos like the Chief. We stand together and from what I gather I would be glad to stand shoulder to shoulder with you if the occasion arose.

      Don’t take offense when none is intended, but more especially don’t attempt to censor the telling of stories and realities of life that have made us all what we are. I love this place and would fight any and all bullshit virtue signaling that I smell coming.

      • April 19, 2020 at 10:52 pm

        History is history and those who forget it are doomed to repeat it
        What happened, happened, we can act all prissy and bewail it now
        But it still happened and was ‘politically correct’ at the time.

        I remember attending a Mess Dinner in the 70’s a formal affair.
        The guest speaker was a retiring Chief Warrant Officer
        the Chief Warrant Officer of the entire Canadian Armed Forces
        that’s Army, Navy, Airforce AND Reserves, anyone with a uniform

        His preamble to his speech, the ‘lead in joke’ as in most speeches
        went as follows: (paraphrased slightly)

        “Not so very many years ago, in this military and most others…
        if you were discovered to be a himosexual you were shot.
        Later on, as it was when I joined, you were imprisoned.
        Until very recently you were discharged as unreliable.
        Now, it’s acceptable.
        I’m sort of glad to be retiring before it becomes mandatory….

        When I joined, it was indeed grounds for discharge as being a security risk due to someone possibly being compromisable if they didn’t want to be ‘outed’.

        Today, I’m not so sure it doesn’t add extra points at the promotion board in order to appear ‘inclusive’.

        Just this week, it was discovered that personal pronouns like ‘he’ and ‘her’ would no longer be used in the Military, at least not within performance reports or other official correspondence, ‘gender neutral’ only for fear of a discrimination suit.

        Sorry if any of this offends those of weak constitution, but what is, is and just because someone doesn’t like it doesn’t mean it didn’t happen or that there isn’t something to be learned from it…provided you’re capable of thinking about what was said instead of falling rabidly upon a word or phrase that isn’t ‘correct’…without considering that 50 years from now, what you think and believe might be classed as ‘hate speak’ by entirely different political provocateurs for entirely different reasons.

  • April 19, 2020 at 2:52 pm
    Stephen J

    I love women. Guess I have most of my life. No excuses.

  • April 19, 2020 at 5:49 pm

    If I were a woman, I would be a lesbian. Mean girls excluded. Like mean guys they shouldn’t exist.

  • April 19, 2020 at 5:51 pm

    Finished in the garden for the day. Transplanted heirloom tomatoes and squash grown from seed. Will be taking extras to the neighbors and the church around the corner. I knew mean girls in my youth. Some turned into mean nasty women and enjoyed inflicting pain on others. It must be difficult to realize all the Female Empowerment lessons turned out to be a Scam of the first order. Are their lives so empty that wrecking havoc is the only way to feel anything. That they have some value even if it is corrupted. They will be alone, not even remembered as a whispered memory forgotten in the night.

    • April 20, 2020 at 12:37 am
      MAJ Arkay

      Actually, I believe the names will be long forgotten, but their evil known as that hiss in the dark.

  • April 19, 2020 at 5:57 pm

    Ya know the VA and TRIWEST are “upgrading” access to community health care with a new ACO-like program (which is crashing because many docs are not signing up for it as the current program pays less Medicaid with three times the paperwork and wasted staff time and this one looks worse) called Community Care Partners.

    Yep. Now vets can have their health care screwed up by the

    Wait for it


    • April 19, 2020 at 6:36 pm

      Those nasty Chi Com Partiers get into all of the nastiest places and do such terrible things.
      All in Chinese Communist Party’s actions in their Unrestricted Warfare. Read their Chinese Communist Peoples Army Officer written paper today. Yet another part in the ongoing plan to destroy Western Civilization.

      • April 19, 2020 at 6:54 pm
        Punta Gorda

        …so they are trying to live up to the stereotype and justify the utter contempt.

  • April 19, 2020 at 7:23 pm

    Those “mean girls” are most often nasty dirty leftist men who would never confront someone directly and make their point. They need to get others to do their mean work for them.
    In light of that and the place in our nations history we find ourselves in right now, and the heavy work that lies in our path, we might consider this excerpt from a speech made in the Sorbonne in the Old World town of Paris By Teddy Roosevelt 110 years ago:

    Excerpt from the speech “Citizenship In A Republic”
    delivered at the Sorbonne, in Paris, France on 23 April, 1910

    It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.

    download PDF of complete speech:

  • April 19, 2020 at 8:00 pm

    And they throw like girls, just as Barack does.

  • April 19, 2020 at 9:47 pm

    Split tails refer to a type of mermaid –split tail vs. single tail. See Starbucks logo for illustration. Then, use your imagination, dirty old sailors.

    • April 19, 2020 at 10:42 pm

      Is a deep fat fryer involved and malt vinegar ….

  • April 19, 2020 at 10:41 pm

    Excellent attribution to Schultz. Well done indeed.

  • April 20, 2020 at 12:32 am
    John M

    OK, it’s 0030 and no new strip… I realize that’s only 2330 in Texas, but tomorrow’s strip is usually posted by now…

    Anyway, this old man has alrready had his “night pills” and I’m having trouble keeping my eyes open, so I’ll check in the morning…

    Hope nothing unfortunate has happened to our illustrious artist!

    • April 20, 2020 at 7:50 am
      Chris Muir

      Nope, just entered the wrong number, argh.

  • April 21, 2020 at 10:03 pm
    nomen nescio

    You’d think it would be understood that different areas with different populations and different climates would have different needs.

    This particular virus has been demonstrated to be very vulnerable to direct sunlight, especially in warm weather. When temperatures approach 80 degrees Fahrenheit and the sun shines, this virus cannot survive for more than a handful of minutes outside a living host, but below freezing it can survive in the environment for weeks or months. Could this be why the death tolls are so much lower in Texas and Florida?

    Perhaps those governors aren’t stupid. Perhaps they know what they’re doing and are doing exactly what is appropriate for their people. Perhaps this is why the Founders, in their wisdom, wanted each individual state to have a strong executive elected by the people, rather than concentrating all power and authority in the federal government. Perhaps?

    I am willing to give them the benefit of the doubt, rather than rush to condemn them.



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