I’m Your Ice Cream Man.
Bona Fides.


  • June 2, 2021 at 12:14 am

    Ironic…after all you’ve done for Javelon Corp they can’t fix your donation bug?

    No, that *is* Portland. What it was, was something else, something good. Much like the formerly united, United States.

  • June 2, 2021 at 12:23 am
    Too Tall

    Well played, Naomi, well played indeed.

    • June 2, 2021 at 10:31 pm
      President Elect Toxic Deplorable Racist SAH Neanderthal B Woodman Domestic Violent Extremist SuperStraight


  • June 2, 2021 at 12:28 am
    William Henry

    13% of the country is feral… let the culling begin.

    • June 2, 2021 at 7:08 am

      More like 3-9% if thanks you’re speaking specific specifics. Jump it another 5-10% if you’re including all ferals of all races. Another maybe 2% if you include the casual ferals who cosplay as normies when they’re not burning cities.

      • June 2, 2021 at 7:50 am
        AngryWhiteMaleChauvanistNeanderthalRightwingExtremist PaulS

        Sounds like 13-15% to me. (Based on averages of your estimates). Was you interpreting the original post as racist or something? 😉

        Oh wait, maybe I shouldn’t be doing the maths and coming up with the answer, cuz that’s RACIST! LOL

  • June 2, 2021 at 12:52 am

    There’s feral, and then there’s feral.

    One of these is not like the other.

    Just saying.

  • June 2, 2021 at 1:28 am

    Yep! Well played Naomi. Whatever, it will be Whitey’s fault

    Seems like Illinois is getting all stirred up about lead water pipes. I guess that “White Supremacy” and “Cuz Slavery” aren’t getting enough traction, so there is need of another excuse. “I could’a been a contender ‘cept for all the paint chips Momma fed me.” But they seem to have over-looked the fumes from the Freeway….. Or them over-head power lines near “our” corner.

  • June 2, 2021 at 7:07 am

    You are correct…..seems feral pigs aren’t the only problem….

  • June 2, 2021 at 7:42 am

    I think taking your kids to Portland now equals child abuse.

  • June 2, 2021 at 7:49 am
    My Way Or -->

    Welp, the NY Slimes is proposing eliminating access to cities by eliminating major transportation routes that commuters and truckers take.

    Not a joke:

    And to think that what we now take for granted – essentially, the interstate transportation system that goes right into cities to deliver goods — is one of those things that made commuting to work easier.

    Think about it for a minute: instead of delivering goods right in the city at OTR freight depots, truckers will drop their loads 50 miles away, and go back for more. And a long OTR trip to go see the grandparents? Take those country back roads instead.

    Yeah, that makes loads of sense, doesn’t it?

    Maybe the Amish aren’t so far off the mark, after all….

    • June 2, 2021 at 8:21 am

      As usual with the NYT, they failed the Campbell Test (after John W. Campbell). It’s called “work out the consequences”.

      “Cities” as they dream of them, are Utopian places for aesthetes to walk around in as they float from one gig to another.

      This rather overlooks the fact that these cities cannot sustain themselves without outside support. The food and etc. has to come from somewhere else.

      Their instant answer (“Light Rail!”) has been proven inadequate to deal with the populations of cities as they exist today. Going to a World Inside (Robert Silverberg 1970-71) population density in trendy “conapts” will make that several orders of magnitude worse.

      The beans have to come from somewhere, and so does the Thai food. Or at least the raw materials for same.

      On the plus side, if you’re a ruthless pragmatist, this sort of Harry Harrison “Soylent Green” dream does the same thing to society that abortion on demand and Free Dope For Life do.

      That is, the people most likely to indulge in it are exactly the sort who plan this sort of thing for everybody else. So they are unlikely to survive, or to beget progeny who will foist their dystopian nonsense on the next generation.

      In the end, Utopians always self-select for extinction. The trick is to avoid them doing you in before they go.

      clear ether


      • June 2, 2021 at 8:56 am

        Indeed. I don’t know how many times I have discussed the consequences of the various “pie in the sky” ideas brought forth by our liberal/Utopian brethren. They tend to look only at one side of an issue, ignoring the downsides, the unintended consequences that are worse than the ‘problem’ they are trying to solve. Then they’re surprised when their ‘well-laid’ plans don’t work.

        How often have we seen that happen? More times than I care to count.

        What’s worse is that rather than cutting their losses and admitting failure, they double down and make a miserable failure even worse (and more expensive), promising that “This time we’ll get it right!” Of course, they won’t.

    • June 3, 2021 at 12:03 am

      If they want us to refuse to use the existing highways to truck goods into their cities, all they have to do is ask. Nothing would make us happier.

  • June 2, 2021 at 8:07 am
    noy fub

    Learjet 23 or 24; that’s a very old jet for the to be riding in. They will have to make at least one fuel stop, maybe two between S. Texas and Portland. Hope it has been well maintained. Those old engines are throwing a lot of CO2 into the air at 41000 feet. So Chris, where are they going to stop along the way?

    • June 2, 2021 at 9:01 am

      Possible engine/control systems upgrade? Newer, more efficient engines would extend the range (by how much I don’t know).

      • June 2, 2021 at 9:42 pm

        Or is it actually Jo or the Big Guy after a BLORP?

        What’s inside might not be what you’d expect in a jet that’s nearly as old as I am.

        clear ether


    • June 3, 2021 at 12:08 am

      Javier has probably retrofitted it to run off nuclear unicorn scat.

  • June 2, 2021 at 10:11 am

    If, if I thought some of those ‘mensa’ people actually read this site, I would start asking everyone to quit pointing out the obvious faults with their brilliant solutions.
    Let them kill themselves. And since 2+2=5 now, my count of ferals is closer to 20%

    • June 2, 2021 at 1:42 pm

      I think of it as “evolution in action”.
      Any “superior” intelligence that cannot bring consequences to the fore in considering any course of action is clearly defective and needs to be banned from the gene pool.
      OTOH a superior intelligence that _does_ make such considerations is often misconstrued. Take the decision to nuke Hiroshima for instance.
      So many people who don’t consider consequences come up with any number of excuses for not using “The Bomb” without considering what it meant to future generations of stupid leaders who would use it without having an explicit demonstration of just what the damned things would do. And YES some idiot _would_ use it despite Edward Teller’s pet project being a thousand times more powerful.
      We still live in fear of “The Bomb” just as we should fear “The Bug”. Covid 19 was manufactured just as surely as Little Boy, and we would be fools not to take steps to somehow foil its successor.

    • June 2, 2021 at 6:24 pm

      Those Mensa people?
      Meh. You never know.

  • June 2, 2021 at 4:21 pm

    I have an idea how we could cut welfare. May take 20 years to complete. After 01/01/2023 only pay for one child and after that it’s on you. Leave existing welfare cases alone till they run out. I think you would see a drop in the welfare queens being added to the rolls. Give free birth control to any who want it. It would be cheaper than paying for a child for 18 years.

    • June 3, 2021 at 12:09 am

      But make sure you get the same terms for “responsibility for product failure” that the vaccine people got.

  • June 2, 2021 at 9:55 pm
    Hotrod Lincoln

    My nephew was a high school student in Beaverton, just a little south of Portland, back in the 1990’s. On “Pride Day” he wore a home-printed T shirt that said “Marriage is for Adam and Eve- – – -Not Adam and Steve!” 15 minutes into the school day they tried to suspend him- – – -until my brother’s attorney (My OTHER brother who was working Pro Bono) informed the school of his intention to file a freedom of speech lawsuit. The kid wore the shirt all day!

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