Today, computerized answering systems are mainly used to frustrate the customer to the point that they give up and hang up.
Post-modern managerial types are mostly blow-dried trust-fund babies in bespoke suits who don’t want to deal with “peasants”. They generally have degrees in something with “Social Justice” in the course syllabus, and spent their college years partying and being “concerned” about things like “climate change”.
In business or government, their post-modern motto is FO;GP- “F**k Off; Get Paid”.
Like that old Microsoft ad that said “It’s how you ‘office'”, they’re all about “officing” and view anybody actually wanting help as an interruption.
Post-modern bureaucracies are Parkinson’s Laws in action. “Process” becomes “Purpose”. And everything ends up as an example of the old military acronym SLICC.
FWIW
To get around AI answering systems, recite/sing the lyrics of any song – I usually quote Yankee Doodle Dandy. After 10-15 seconds the AI gets frustrated and hands you off to a human receptionist.
I recently got a high-end car from a schmancy dealership, and 90% of their phone numbers are answered by AI. I’m sure that they are just using what their corporate bosses told them to, but I’m going to have a talk with their manager the next time I am there and convince him that live receptionists are more bespoke than AI idiocy.
I remember dealing with ‘real people’ back in the day. Recall being ‘transferred’ from one to another until ending up with the original person… then being put on endless ‘hold’. Their motto was ‘A problem transferred is a problem solved’. Not saying modern ‘answering machines’ are an improvement.
Worst I’ve experienced: Recently needed to speak to a live body at IRS to confirm where my refund had been sent after I stupidly left off a number on my direct deposit account, online system said it’s been sent but after several days I investigated and found my error. Bank rep says they automatically (and I’m not giving their system a full pass but there is always a live agent there) returns the funds and it goes into IRS hell where you cannot find out if they got it back, when they will resend it etc, went through multiple circular systems even the “hack” access mentioned online, but fuhgeddabout it, you ain’t getting through. Eventually (3 weeks) it shows up on our online account saying they need a corrected account…could have told me that long ago (and you cannot do it yourself until they send you a linked notice), and eventually the money came through. Larger amount (27K) as we had made a change in one of the biz accounts, so a month without it hurt, but of course nobody cares and there is not even anybody to complain to. Yeah this whole modernized customer service phone tag shit is for the birds.
Re: A.I. I had a 5 figure math problem
recently, which A.I. gave me the wrong
answer to.
I found this out after doing it the old
fashioned way, to prove it was right,
and got a different answer, so I entered
it into Duck Duck Go and got the same
answer I got with my own figures.
I checked my figures again, and I and
DDG were still in agreement.
Finding: cant trust A.I.
Regardless, we cannot let another
country (I`m thinking China) get
ahead of us.
“Finding: can’t trust A.I.” — Agree. Helping friend find nearby medical place, AI gave info on ‘closest one’ – 4 miles. Google map indicated it was actually 15 miles.
And then if you ask them if they know where you live, they will strenuously deny it!
August 19, 2026 at 11:24 am
Kafiroon
This applies again. Many years ago, during Viet Nam, a couple of us had a ground level apartment in The Peoples Socialist Republic of Madison where our large group hung out because we had food and appropriate liquids. The Very common saying was:
“Come the Revolution I’m going to burn down Ma Bell!”
Maybe time to rename the target.
My youngest works incall Customer Service, the past few years he’s been doing roadside assistance for rental cars, several auto companies and CAA, and hasn’t been replaced by a computer…yet…I’m not sure if an AI’s decision tree could handle some of the calls he gets…not as bad as when he was working for a credit card company..he works overnght shifts and other than time zones, you don’t generally get people calling to ask about their balance at 3AM, you get the drunks wondering why they’ve been cut off for exceeding their limit…at the casino…almost as good as the ones taking a rental car from sunny BC (the commiefornia of the north) into the arctic (it’s a straight drive) and wondering why they can’t start it and the company won’t deliver them a replacement for free..
The stories he tells just prove that most people are better off talking to a computer because they don’t want to reach through the phone and shake some sense into them.
If I answer the phone and hear a computer generated voice I just hang up, if it’s important someone will call back.
If I get the “Hel-LO my name is ‘Robert’ is this Mr ‘my FIRST name’ ? in an Indian accent so thick you can’t understand them, I introduce them to something they’ve probably never heard before…on my desk is a real phone with a handset…most people have never had a phone slammed down in their ear before, pity I can’t hear their reaction to the experience 🙂
When you get “Billy” on the phone and he has a very heavy accent just ask him what time it is. “Billy” will usually tell you it’s a eight or ten hours difference.
It’s the part where they have to pause and try to pronounce ‘their’ name three or four times that gets me 🙂 That gets a “find a real job you cowardly thief” before the slam…I’m never replacing that phone 🙂 You can even get ‘smart phones’ that look like a real phone now so the joy can still be passed around.
19 Comments
This is exactly why whenever someone asks an AI “How can we protect ourselves from AI the answer is always, “It’s too late.”
Absolutely agree! There have been times…
Today, computerized answering systems are mainly used to frustrate the customer to the point that they give up and hang up.
Post-modern managerial types are mostly blow-dried trust-fund babies in bespoke suits who don’t want to deal with “peasants”. They generally have degrees in something with “Social Justice” in the course syllabus, and spent their college years partying and being “concerned” about things like “climate change”.
In business or government, their post-modern motto is FO;GP- “F**k Off; Get Paid”.
Like that old Microsoft ad that said “It’s how you ‘office'”, they’re all about “officing” and view anybody actually wanting help as an interruption.
Post-modern bureaucracies are Parkinson’s Laws in action. “Process” becomes “Purpose”. And everything ends up as an example of the old military acronym SLICC.
Self-Licking Ice Cream Cone.
As George Carlin once said,
“It’s a big club, and you ain’t in it”.
clear ether
eon
“They generally have degrees in something with “Social Justice” in the course syllabus…”
You forgot to state that the title of their course of study usually ends in the word “Studies”.
George was so right on this. Thanks Eon. …I think .
Has anyone here tried the Unplugged phone? I’m thinking that will be my next one.
FWIW
To get around AI answering systems, recite/sing the lyrics of any song – I usually quote Yankee Doodle Dandy. After 10-15 seconds the AI gets frustrated and hands you off to a human receptionist.
I recently got a high-end car from a schmancy dealership, and 90% of their phone numbers are answered by AI. I’m sure that they are just using what their corporate bosses told them to, but I’m going to have a talk with their manager the next time I am there and convince him that live receptionists are more bespoke than AI idiocy.
And one of the reasons the Sears Appliance Repair no longer has my business
I remember dealing with ‘real people’ back in the day. Recall being ‘transferred’ from one to another until ending up with the original person… then being put on endless ‘hold’. Their motto was ‘A problem transferred is a problem solved’. Not saying modern ‘answering machines’ are an improvement.
Worst I’ve experienced: Recently needed to speak to a live body at IRS to confirm where my refund had been sent after I stupidly left off a number on my direct deposit account, online system said it’s been sent but after several days I investigated and found my error. Bank rep says they automatically (and I’m not giving their system a full pass but there is always a live agent there) returns the funds and it goes into IRS hell where you cannot find out if they got it back, when they will resend it etc, went through multiple circular systems even the “hack” access mentioned online, but fuhgeddabout it, you ain’t getting through. Eventually (3 weeks) it shows up on our online account saying they need a corrected account…could have told me that long ago (and you cannot do it yourself until they send you a linked notice), and eventually the money came through. Larger amount (27K) as we had made a change in one of the biz accounts, so a month without it hurt, but of course nobody cares and there is not even anybody to complain to. Yeah this whole modernized customer service phone tag shit is for the birds.
“A problem transferred is a problem solved”
Nah, government websites still do this!
https://henrybowman.wordpress.com/2018/12/01/flinger-pointing/
“(you cannot do it yourself until they send you a linked notice)”
And when the government WANTS to be behind the technology curve… they will happily do it for you!
https://henrybowman.wordpress.com/2018/11/10/cashless-society-meet-pony-express/
Re: A.I. I had a 5 figure math problem
recently, which A.I. gave me the wrong
answer to.
I found this out after doing it the old
fashioned way, to prove it was right,
and got a different answer, so I entered
it into Duck Duck Go and got the same
answer I got with my own figures.
I checked my figures again, and I and
DDG were still in agreement.
Finding: cant trust A.I.
Regardless, we cannot let another
country (I`m thinking China) get
ahead of us.
“Finding: can’t trust A.I.” — Agree. Helping friend find nearby medical place, AI gave info on ‘closest one’ – 4 miles. Google map indicated it was actually 15 miles.
And then if you ask them if they know where you live, they will strenuously deny it!
This applies again. Many years ago, during Viet Nam, a couple of us had a ground level apartment in The Peoples Socialist Republic of Madison where our large group hung out because we had food and appropriate liquids. The Very common saying was:
“Come the Revolution I’m going to burn down Ma Bell!”
Maybe time to rename the target.
I never call unless my problem is only fixable by a person. Talking with the phone tree/AI, every answer to every prompt is
“I WANT TO SPEAK WITH A FUC&ING AGENT YOUFUC*ING ELECTRONIC COW!!!!!”
My youngest works incall Customer Service, the past few years he’s been doing roadside assistance for rental cars, several auto companies and CAA, and hasn’t been replaced by a computer…yet…I’m not sure if an AI’s decision tree could handle some of the calls he gets…not as bad as when he was working for a credit card company..he works overnght shifts and other than time zones, you don’t generally get people calling to ask about their balance at 3AM, you get the drunks wondering why they’ve been cut off for exceeding their limit…at the casino…almost as good as the ones taking a rental car from sunny BC (the commiefornia of the north) into the arctic (it’s a straight drive) and wondering why they can’t start it and the company won’t deliver them a replacement for free..
The stories he tells just prove that most people are better off talking to a computer because they don’t want to reach through the phone and shake some sense into them.
If I answer the phone and hear a computer generated voice I just hang up, if it’s important someone will call back.
If I get the “Hel-LO my name is ‘Robert’ is this Mr ‘my FIRST name’ ? in an Indian accent so thick you can’t understand them, I introduce them to something they’ve probably never heard before…on my desk is a real phone with a handset…most people have never had a phone slammed down in their ear before, pity I can’t hear their reaction to the experience 🙂
When you get “Billy” on the phone and he has a very heavy accent just ask him what time it is. “Billy” will usually tell you it’s a eight or ten hours difference.
It’s the part where they have to pause and try to pronounce ‘their’ name three or four times that gets me 🙂 That gets a “find a real job you cowardly thief” before the slam…I’m never replacing that phone 🙂 You can even get ‘smart phones’ that look like a real phone now so the joy can still be passed around.