how much voltage does it take to make fat catch on fire??? 🙂
It’s not the voltage, but the current. 40 amps ought to do it.
And 0.1+ amps across the chest can cause cardiac arrest.
Land whale or not relatively low current or electron pressure, i.e., 0.25 amps will stop a human heart.
Tasers and stun-guns work by inducing paralysis via pulsed >100 KV voltages. There’s essentially no current so they don’t (as a rule) kill but the extreme voltages induce temporary paralysis and usually unconsciousness. Unfortunately for folks (like me) with pacemakers and ICDs (implanted cardiac defibrillator like Dick Cheney) the voltage pulses induce current in the wires leading to the inside of the heart. Almost certainly lethal at least in part because by the time the people around the one who was tased realize that something is wrong, the person has already been in cardiac arrest too long.
Sam needs to be pretty careful here. Fat is a fairly decent insulator, with the result that tasers can cause obese people an enraging level of pain without actually disabling them.
Whoa – that’s a shocker! (Sorry couldn’t help myself)
I know Sam carries some interesting toys, but where does she hide THAT!
She’ll never tell.
I think someone mentioned Tamara Long the other day.
Is that set to “Stun” or “Medium Rare”?
I think that in most jurisdictions, Sam is already in “Call the Lawyer” country. Then, there is “Karen” to watch out for.
Personally….I’d prefer “Flambe”.
I vote for “Plaid.”
Sam looks particularly fetching in panel number three.
I suspect the ice cream shop proprietor has already advised Tucker to bring the Hazmat wagon. Otherwise, Tucker is going to need a whole lot more plastic sheeting in the backseat of his squad car.
Hazmat indeed. Given the location of the darts, that should produce a spasmodic response of the sphincter. Coupled with sympathetic contraction of all nearby muscle groups, you might be in a hazard zone if the spandex fails to contain the pressure…
Actually, her defense would be that she was simply defending her minor children from an assault. IMS, Texas law makes an assault of a minor by an adult a felony. Texas law (Penal Code Chapter 9) also allows a 3rd party to use force to defend another in any situation where they would be justified in using force to defend themselves. Panel 1 clearly shows Triggly-Puff’s hands in an aggressive, threatening posture. No jury in that part of Texas (Houston, Austin, Dallas/Ft Worth and San Antonio are different) would convict Sam. I seriously doubt the DA for Presidio County would even consider prosecuting Sam under the circumstances.
Don’t you folks remember the “Convention” at the Seniors planet in the “Number of the Beast”?
Lazarus is one of the reasons I took up the kilt.
Same place Minerva Long packs her Blaster (or was it a candy bar?)
Give it all it’s got Sam. That there land whale has a whole lot of blubber to fry.
Well, now, Fatty’s hand was way within the social distancing barrier, so everything its partner claimed about the twins applies to it, too.
I am curious, though, as to which town this is taking place. Not a whole lot of them in the ranch’s vicinity, and most of them would not tolerate these two creatures, much less have one on the city/town council.
Nice to see Sam’s not puttin’ up with their crap.
I would think any nearby town would know not to mess with the denizens of the DD.
Karens are always on the town council. They start out by ruining HOAs, then graduate to telling the neighboring neighborhoods what to do, then to telling the whole town. And, they have the energy and desire to actually run and defeat some good ol’ boy. (Always with some plan to ‘fix’ things and appeal to every single person who ever said “there ought to be a law!”)
They detour through the school board as well to raise your taxes and indoctrinate children to be good little Progtard DildoCrats.
“Nice to see Sam’s not puttin’ up with their crap.”
She will be soon, just from the orientation of that blow-hole and the electric discharge soon to hit the anus.
They anywhere near Austin? Might as well be in NYC.
Turn that whole criminal/victim dynamic upside down real quick.
Sam’s shown a lot of patience with that fat cow. Far more than she deserves
Go ahead and squeeze, Sam- – – – – -where those probes are sticking, there will be smoked ham on the menu!
I’m not that familiar with Tasers, but I thought once you fired the needles the charge was automatically applied… anyone?
Not until you press the trigger
I’m not sure about the civilian models, but the standard police issue X26 series, when the probes hit, they are electrified for 20 seconds. A subsequent pull of the trigger will give a second dose of “Edison Medicine “.
Taser is a brand name of a manufacturer of conducted energy weapons. Very popular with the police departments.
It depends on the model but most conducted energy weapons need trigger pull to energize. I heard of a model that discharges automatically but I suspect that could be a liability issue.
Pulling the barbs out of Lardo won’t be fun…
As I said, I don’ t know that much about them, bu when I see them used on the “real” police shows, it always looks like they’re doing the “Electron Dance” as soon as the needles hit.
I do know that once you fire the needles, that part needs to be replaced.
Xir can pull her own needles, I wouldn’t “go there” for all the gold in Fort Knox… Maybe Karen could help.
Probably an improved model designed by Javier 😉
With voltage increasing the longer you hold the trigger
Some models let you use the probes without firing them
as a ‘contact’ CED, or a ‘come along’..or just for a display
Sometimes seeing the spark deescalates a situation
aaaand sometimes it escalates it…
depends on if you want a reason to pull the trigger through
They go by Axon now, and they’re the name you see stamped on bodycam video. Applied for a job with those guys a couple years ago. Probably a good investment!
“Taser” was actually originally an acronym. Thomas A. Swift’s Electric Rifle.
In reaching for the twins, Triggly violated not only the “social distancing” she and her Alpha were trying to “enforce”, but also a little statute called “felony menacing”. Or as we used to call it, the “keep your hands to yourself” law.
If she’d actually grabbed them, that would be “simple assault” in most states.
Either one used to be good for 30 days in the local lockup.
The newer models have a “two-stage” trigger. The first stage fires the darts, continuing to pull to stage 2 sends the voltage. Think of the FN P-90, pull the trigger to the first stop, one shot at a time. Pull it all the way…..full auto.
Exactly… and Sam has great trigger discipline…
That does not look like a bat out of hell
It sure isn’t Paradise by the Dashboard Lights, at least not until the last verse where everybody is praying for the end of time.
Meatloaf. Obscure to the xer’s references. Actor and singer before the time of the whelping of the two xers. There may be some charged electric dance steps involved. Xer does not need toast.
Nothing for Love or Money would a sane person do that…
Meatloaf was also obnoxiously fat. Good music, though.
5…4…3…2…1… Set the magic pixies free now !
Sam charges up the electric pig … and, goodbye garbage!
Ah, the Edison Medicine. I would love to have had such toys when I was pushing Holsteins in Riverside County. BWCs would have been nice, too–I had to get by with micro-cassette recorders back then. It was SO NICE to unplug a humbug Tale of Drunkenness And Cruelty citizen complaint with a recorded version of the actual conversation. A real script-flipper, just like BWCs are.
Um, Sam is a lefty? Or is her right hand holding the heavy artillery?
Sam, being a responsible gun owner, likely practices with her off hand to become equally proficient. It also means she doesn’t need to turn her body in order to hit her target.
I assume it’s just a function of which holster is on which side.
1. Can’t miss that target.
2. Modern textile engineering is amazing. There is a hefty amount of stress testing of the tensile strength of Triggly Puff’s / Meatloaf’s clothing in the second panel. Only problem is that under that load, there are no graceful degradations. The failure will be extremely kinetic.
3. I am reminded of Pamela’s comment sometime ago about “a forty year old, 300 pound, mother of 12, stuffed into size 00 yoga pants. Not a becoming look at all.
Triggly Puff! That’s the name I couldn’t get back to! Thank you, Too Tall. It’s exactly what I was thinking of on the appearance of this one here.
I saw one of those the other day walking down the street. You know the yoga pants are too tight and way past being used as a rag when you can see a large heart tattoo on the wearer’ more than ample backside.
You mean you could read her tattoos in Braille at 100 yards?
Burning human flesh smells just like pork burning. There must be a stench in the air there. Must smell just like when the pig caught fire while cooking it. That will teach me to pay attention. What a waste of 100 + Lbs of going to be good eating. On the other hand the porker in the picture would do well to get a little roasted.
My bad Sam didn’t pull the trigger yet. Damn.
Is that why it’s called “Long Pig”.
I am trying to figure out why I read “not good” in the voice of the FPSrussia guy.
wasn’t that in some game ad a few years back?
Wit until bushhog there gets the bill for the piercings…
The girls have already had to pull back from the whale’s reach (see the girl* in pink’s hair? as if she’s suddenly moving backward?), so she’s already triggered (pun intended) defense-of-others.
I have to wonder just how Chris is going to draw the next few panels, if she pulls that trigger. 🙂
(* How do I tell which girl is which? They’re twins, and I can’t tell them apart.)
Mari (reddish brown hair, brown eyes) is in the pink top. Kiko (brown hair, grey/blue eyes) is in the dark top.
Sam’s a typical Mom. She Wolf X Mama Grizz.
Mama Grizz with Lipstick too !
I also had to go back to 4-27 to just refresh my eyes !
I think that’s Naomi. A different hottie, but all DD affiliated women tend to be stunners with similar morphology.
“DON’T TASE MY HOLE!”
Honestly though, if you notice the left buttock is framed by the darts. My guess is that it will have the greatest charge when they are activated and have the greatest spasm. This will likely cause acceleration of to the cows right as she involuntary lurches forward when her left leg pushes out uncontrollably, probably loosing traction and flopping to the deck in a convulsing mass of violently twitching flab.
You win the interwebs for the day! I’ve been trying to figure out how the Don’t Tase Me, Bro meme fits here.
A little late for that. I don’t think “I wuz jist funnin’ wi th ’em” is gonna play here.
I can’t speak to the models sold for purchase by the general public, but the TASER I carried as a police officer automatically initiate a 5 second charge when the trigger is pulled to fire the darts. If the safety is engaged, the charge is interrupted. Unless that happens, one pull of the trigger generates a 5 charge.
TASER (stands for Thomas A. Swift’s Electric Rifle – a 1911 novel) devices sold to the general public can have up to a 30 second fire-it-and-forget- it type of discharge. The idea being that in a self-defense situation, one fires the TASER into the attacker then drops the TASER and takes off running. The manufacturer advertises free replacement in that case as their way of discouraging staying around for further physical confrontation.
Incidentally, here is the original 1911 story;
I did not know that TASER was a Tom Swift acronym.
I remember reading those “Tom Swift and his………” series of books as a preteen. My dad’s collection. Don’t remember the dates, but it seems to me that they were from the 20s & 30s. Been a long time since I remember reading those. I like to think those books pointed me in the direction I am today.
Here you go;
Books by Appleton, Victor on Project Gutenberg;
Incidentally, I grew up on the 1950s-70s “Tom Swift Jr. ” books, in which Tom Sr. often appeared.
Ummm… it should say 4/30/2020
I know it is easy to forget what day of Wuhan House Arrest & Socialist Test Run it is…
Be well & Stay well…
This is one case where Triggaly Puff needs to be “Triggered”.
But it might cause a relaxation of certain muscles when the reaction is done. It’s a good thing that everyone has masks available.
I love the last panel, where Sam is in a pose that would look good on the paperback cover of a noir detective story…
Sam fire up the song “Safety Dance” and see if you can get the Taser to make her to dance to it.
If Javier has modded it enough. “Neutron Dance” might fit better 😉
Light ‘er up
That wide load needs caution signs and port and starboard running lights.
And a chase car.
With a huge SLOW sign. Triggly Puff does not get weighed. One measures Xir’s displacement.
Once the fuse has been initiated, the proper form is to announce “Fire in the Hole!”
De-Con is going to be ridiculous, so run for your lives.
If this rolls over to tomorrow, someone’s going to be calling “Mayday!”
No one should subjected to view.
Need brain bleach to remove the 2nd panel…
I need kittens!
Playing with soft and furry does help
“Squeal Bitch” should be the next words out of Sam’s mouth.
Not only are the girls withdrawing, they appear to be crying. Emotional distress?
I’m sure she’s practiced left, right, and both, hands and eyes.
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