Mint Condition.
Stuff It.


  • November 26, 2019 at 12:06 am

    When it comes to Red’s sub-orbital turkey launches, high IS normal!

    “T” minus 72 hours and counting…

  • November 26, 2019 at 12:08 am
    John Mercer

    Wait! Stop! We’re three days early for ballistic turkeys – you’ll have NORAD and every other Air Defense Center in the world on Condition Red! War Games?

  • November 26, 2019 at 12:09 am

    Sam will never be “normal”.


    Remember, due east is your best performance launch for payload and altitude.

  • November 26, 2019 at 12:13 am
    Too Tall

    Sam is looking for the “Thermonuclear” setting on her oven. She thinks of it as “Dial-a-Yield.”

    Is it too much to ask that it drops in on a hypersonic re-entry, live on TV, on the Chair of the House (lack of) Intelligence Committee along with the rest of his fellow Progtard DildoCrats turkeys?

  • November 26, 2019 at 12:20 am

    What’s flyover country like from up there?

    Kamala Harris has declared a Right to Clean Water for all Americans, introduced a “Water Justice Act” pledging $250 billion.

    There’s about 60 million rural Americans spread out over 97% of the land. That whole amount is around $4000 per rural American. She doesn’t know much about the cost of merely drilling a well. Guess if rural people want the water they’re owed after the city folk get serviced, they’ll just have to move to the labor camps, voluntarily or otherwise.

    • November 26, 2019 at 1:06 am

      Kamala doesn’t know much, period.

      • November 26, 2019 at 2:57 am
        Punta Gorda

        “I’m not aware of too many things…”

      • November 26, 2019 at 10:33 pm

        “I know that it looks like I pee when I sing…”

  • November 26, 2019 at 1:02 am

    Sam needs explosion protected instrumentation installed in her ‘birds’.
    There might be cash money for highest ballistic civilian launched projectile.
    Maybe she can achieve orbital. I don’t think turkeys have any radar signature.

    • November 26, 2019 at 12:20 pm

      I remember for Desert Storm they reworked old air-dropped dumb bombs into smart bomb guided munitions by adding electronic packages with moving fins.

      What’ll it take for a turkey to have a guided reentry? I want to see her hit the DNC HQ, when it’s empty for the holiday of course.

  • November 26, 2019 at 1:18 am

    Ah, Redline… keeping America safe, one turkey at a time… I’m glad she can fly…

    Like Mr Carlson stammered, “As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly.”

  • November 26, 2019 at 1:18 am
    Stephanie Osborn

    “As God is my witness, I thought turkeys could fly.”

    You’re in the wrong place, dude. You need the turkeys of the Double D…

  • November 26, 2019 at 3:04 am

    For God’s sake, DUCK AND COVER !!

  • November 26, 2019 at 7:40 am

    And so it begins….

  • November 26, 2019 at 7:44 am

    Sam puts a new outlook on the old “turkey shoot.”

  • November 26, 2019 at 9:41 am

    I’m so old I remember….
    NORAD reporting on the annual radar signals of some sort of Unidentified Object flying out of the North Pole, and traveling around various parts of the planet, on Christmas Eve. ….
    I’ll be keeping my eye on “Ancient Aliens” for the interpretation of “The Regular Thanksgiving event”, and how it came to influence “Tide Pod” generation reverence for the smouldering entities that fell from the sky.
    Can’t WAIT to see the sculptural depictions designed into the surface of avocado toast!

    • November 26, 2019 at 1:46 pm
      MAJ Arkay

      NORAD still reports on that UFO each Christmas Eve. But they do it on the internet now.

  • November 26, 2019 at 1:41 pm

    Things in common: As the hen turkey said, “You only love me for my breasts and thighs.”

    Had the kids up Saturday for an early Thanksgiving on the farm. Roasted the 19-lb brined, stuffed bird in the Big Egg over apple charcoal for four hours. It was perfect.

  • November 26, 2019 at 1:46 pm

    I know it’s against the trope here, but Sam could cook a turkey properly in about 45 minutes in a regular oven. I’ve done it. But just to keep it fun, she could mistake gunpowder for thyme in the stuffing …

  • November 26, 2019 at 2:11 pm

    Feel-good bipartisan news from the Daily Caller via Twitter: “President @realDonaldTrump signs the Women’s Suffrage Centennial Commemorative Coin Act which will direct the U.S. Treasury to issue $1 coins commemorating the ratification of the 19th Amendment and honor the history of the women’s suffrage movement.”

    They’ll be about the size of a quarter, gold colored, with a picture of well-respected suffragette Susan B. Anthony… Ah, maybe not. These will be silver, but the 2020 release year is a short time to make new dies so they could consider some recycling, maybe.

    • November 26, 2019 at 10:58 pm

      Huh. So they expect people to buy these as opposed to release them into circulation as legal tender? Last I knew the previous dollar coins are largely in gov storage or in collections. Americans don’t want to use them. And with the rise of wireless funds transfers for all manner of services, who wants to screw around with coins?

  • November 26, 2019 at 5:31 pm
    James F Gemind

    Dammit Zed!! She’s an engineer, not cook! 😆

  • November 26, 2019 at 9:08 pm
    Toxic Deplorable Racist B Woodman

    Define “normal”.

  • November 26, 2019 at 11:22 pm

    What about her mashed potatoes? Can they be used as Bondo?

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