Day By Day

Comments

  • Grunt GI

    Bwahahaha. Here are some agenda topics

    • The proper use of y’all, y’alls, and all y’all

    • how to use fixin’ in a sentence..to wit “I’m fixin’ to start dinner y’all whaddya all y’all want?”

    •proper use of units of measure like ‘yonder’ and ‘back forty’

    • the proper method of making biscuits and gravy.

    •how to properly install a gun rack in your truck

    Can’t wait to see all those New York and California loons head out to flyover country to go on safari with us hicks and bible thumpers.

    • Interventor

      Also, proper use of plural all y’all.

    • Noelegy

      What if they found out we weren’t as awful as they thought?

      • eon

        That will never happen, as they are incapable of error. They’ll just accuse us of being trained impersonators.

        Their entire worldview comes from a phantasmagorical la-la land inside their heads, that makes less sense than the movie The President’s Analyst, which was deliberately intended to be nonsensical.

        clear ether

        eon

        • ExNuke

          You can’t find out anything about someone by talking TO them. We already know the important things about Repressives and Regressives.

      • Swansonic

        I heard on Rush’s show a while back about a book? / magazine article written by a Lady from Berkeley who went to learn about small town red state people and was shocked to learn that they were nice, friendly and genuinely tried to help her understand their views.

        She’s probably still in therapy….

        • Probably. Reality, what a bitch.

        • Lucius Severus Pertinax

          Or maybe she just found a nice country man who makes her toes curl … and then breakfast.. 😉

    • Henry

      I remember an editorial cartoon from years ago, in which a flack was trying to teach Mike Dukakis to “speak Southern.”

      “Let’s here you say y’all.”
      “Youse.”
      “No. Y’all.”
      “Yerall.”
      “Y’all.”
      “Y’all.”
      “That’s great! Now try: grits.”
      “Porridge!”

    • noncom

      You forgot rat cheer….”Set that chair rat cheer”….

  • Vince

    Full of ‘thit’!

  • JohninMd.(Help!?!!)

    When Schumer cries, Hell will actually freeze over. Talk about crock-a-dial tears… (Spelling intentional.)

  • epador

    Somehow I am reminded of the insipid farmersonly.com commercials.

  • Deplorable B Woodman

    When I heard about the squeezed out tears, all I could think of was Cry-Baby Boner. UpSchmuck and Boner, conjoined twins joined at the dick? When they were separated, who got the bigger prick?

    I cannot claim originality on this. I remember it from a Friars Roast of many decades back. Don Rickles & ??

    • epilitimus

      To answer the above question we would have to know who it was that wielded the meat cleaver.

      • Lucius Severus Pertinax

        A Moyil with a large knife and a bad hangover…

        • Pamela

          Lucius

          That is a Spew Alert of the First Order.

          Thankfully my coffee is still brewing.

          I wonder if he was cut on a bias?

          • Spin Drift

            If it was a Friar’s roast, it was cut on the dais.

            Spin
            Founding member of the Rusty Blade Tavern

    • GWB

      It’s “is”, not “got”. “IS”, DBW……..

      • Bill G

        Neither of those should be called a prick.
        A prick is useful.

        • Old Codger

          ‘Bout all those two are any use for is pissing . . . and moaning. 😉

  • Deplorable B Woodman

    I’d enjoy kicking the thit out of Thumer.

  • Kafiroon

    Since all progs speak thit, they may get their teeth punth out trying to speak their thit to real Americans.

  • Pamela

    It figures the Demon spawn would do something as insipid as teaching their operatives on how to fit into the rest of America. Why is it that they think/believe/assume anyone outside of their incest riddled circles are all hicks from the backwoods?

    • epilitimus

      that’s easy…they assume themselves to be superior therefore all other lifeforms must be more primitive as they have not “progressed” as much. They also assume that non prog humanoids are lower down the tree of life than all other self ambulatory lifeforms.

    • Why? Oh, that’s very simple. They never go outside a building willingly. They get into a car IN a garage and drive into another garage to get out of that car. They don’t know that the sky is actually blue because they’ve never seen it, unless it was on TV. With online access, they don’t even get the newspapers any more, so there’s no tactile quality to anything.

      Besides that, they’re stupid.

      • Pamela

        Is that why the Regular Folks paint COW during Deer Season on the side of their herds…
        They can identify any number of transgressions, racism and any other current Hate du jour cause they come up with, but have no clue on life outside their narrow view of existence.

        • JTC

          Have to disagree…their own existence embodies the highest number of transgressions, racism and hate, but they are incapable of identifying that at all.

      • John

        They are not just stupid. They are WILLFULLY stupid.
        And they are not just ignorant. They are WILLFULLY ignorant.
        Their arrogance is awe inspiring.

    • NotYetInACamp

      They are obsessed with Central Control. That is why Progressives concentrate on federal power. That way they control from the center and guide the ignorant (their belief) masses without ever having to communicate with them, or, God forbid what is happening now, actually talk with one. Now they are taking lessons on how to speak with Americans, and I am sure how to hide who they really are. Taqiyya, except Progressive style.

      Somewhere someone is saying No Thit Schmucky Senator Schmuck.

    • Ozymandias

      Yeah, they’ll fit right in, just like “The Bug” did wearing his Edgar suit in “Men in Black”.

    • epilitimus

      Question: How can they possibly teach one another how to talk to AmeriCANs given they are the original AmeriCANTs?

      • eon

        Brock will teach them the finer points of how to talk down to the rest of us more effectively.

        It’s all he really knows, and he believes that he’s actually good enough at it to make people see the world his way.

        He doesn’t let little things like his inability to run a successful Presidential campaign worry him. Once everyone has their ignorance, bigotry, and stupidity explained to them properly, they will have an epiphany and worship Brock and his ilk as they deserve.

        The Eich had nothing on Brock in that regard. He has enough arrogance for Lan, Amp, Prellin of Bronseca, and Bleeko of Lonabar put together.

        Of course, he’s probably never bothered to look them up and find out just how their careers ended, either.

        clear ether

        eon

        • Lucius Severus Pertinax

          Eon….. is it POSSIBLE that George Soros is ACTUALLY Gharlane of Eddore???????

          • Bill G

            Bwah-hah-hah-hahahahahahahah
            ROFLAMFAO!!!!

          • MasterDiver

            A form of flesh energized by a foul, evil intelligence from the distant stars….YES it’s possible!

            Zar Belk

          • Now hold on just a freekin’ minute there, pilgrim! That sounds like the Snakes. They hate everything that goes free on the planet. They want robots, not people.

            Has anyone looked at Soros’s his eyes yet?

    • Vince

      I grew up in the motel industry in Montana…. the questions you get from the big city people are nuts… “When does the stage coach come?” in is only one. I wish it was satire.

    • Spin Drift

      Dear Mr. Camp:

      As a newly arrived immigrant to the south from the south (Bronx that is), I’s have me a quandary. My special snowflake daughter who is attending engineerun’ school at the fine institution on the plain has gone and got herself an all expenses paid ride to ‘Bama School of Law.

      How do I greet her now? I just can’t say “Roll Tide” as I do abide in Auburn now. What the missus and I have come up with is “War Leagal.” If you have any other insight in this matter we would be appreciative.

      Bless your heart and pass the pecan pie;

      Mr. and Mrs. Drift
      War Damn Screaming Eagle (for Chris’s Dad)

      • NotYetInACamp

        🙂

      • NotYetInACamp

        I dated a Bear Girl back when, and I had graduated Notre Dame. This was when we pounded each other on the field regularly as great teams. No advice but be nice, and be polite. Those count.
        (Then I went to U Miami Law and wore my Notre Dame shirt to the Rathskeller Bar on the U Miami campus. Aint I a stinker.)

      • JTC

        Spin,

        See, it ain’t the state of residence but the state of mind that makes one a redneck American…there’re places I’ve been to at the top of NY and MI where the people and surroundings made me think I’d died and gone on to God’s Country. And a look at that county-by-county red/blue map proves the point. Hilarious that the leftards believe it’s all just a matter of colloquialisms; we’re all better off just being ourselves and good patriots, as most of us here have done time and again.

        “I’s have me a quandary”? Dude. Leave that wrongness up to the ‘tards. But I do love me some peecan pie.

        • Spin Drift

          JTC:

          Most of that was sarcasm but the really living down here and the special snowflake going to ‘bama law are true. Yes I am a native New Yorker that was educated in Minnesota, met the Pretty Wife in Dallas and worked in Chicago. So I’ve been all over but always longed for the South.

          Please understand that most of the northern liberal babyboomers and Gen x and y got there impression of the south from the Andy Griffith show, Beverly Hilbillies and Mayberry RFD. Both first run and rerun series. It’s going to be tough to overcome those ingrained stereotypes. My relatives and coworkers about lost their collective minds when we told them we were moving. It was a sight to see as I heard more than one tripe anecdote of how my IQ was going to plummet and we were sure to lose all our teeth.

          So we keep it a secret of how special a place it is down here and don’t encourage visitors.

          Spin
          War Damn Screaming Eagle

      • NotYetInACamp

        Mr and Mrs Spin,
        While I am a Flowdah Cracker, I grew up in the Southernmost Borough of New York called Miami Beach, or are y’all our Northern Boroughs. I have been infected with both. I often cannot discern some particularities. As an old time family from M’ama, I knew many wonderful Southerners that did live here. Be nicer than I is always a good suggestion. To be as nice as my mom is another suggestion that few will ever obtain. But it is a good aspiration.

  • Grunt GI

    Trump fires Obama hack at DOJ:

    I can see the scene. “Yates, you’re an Obama hack…. Who doesn’t get to impose your views on America..You’re fired”.

    Lawyers are happy to defend Serial killers and terrorists but not the Ametican people. I’m sure the ACLU will hire her. Hell Soros might make her a concubine.

    So much winning. It’s almost better than the DBD swimming hole

    Almost.

    More fun tomorrow with the SCOTUS pick.

  • jackdeth72

    Well done, Mr. Muir!

    • WayneM

      That’s the problem with being a media whore like Schumie… These kind of quotable quotes sometimes come back to bite you in the ass.

  • JTC

    So I’m about to comment about who else attempts to assimilate with the thought of destroying from the inside, thinking no one else had yet made the obvious connection…but then, yeah, there it is, almost offhandedly, from one of the usual suspects: “Taqiyya, except Progressive style.” Spelling aside, the always perceptive NYIAC has it exactly right.

    Here’s a little more depth though, albeit from a simpler time; rumor has it Schumer & Co. tried to hire Jeff Foxworthy to tutor them, until they found out what a fake and poser he himself is.

    Know who and when was first to the contemporary Redneck College? Steve Mitchell, humor columnist for the Palm Beach Post, with his “How to Speak Southern” in what year? 1976 of course. We know what happened then, when the country (including me!) couldn’t get enough of the folksly peanut farmer from Plains, Ga. Of course back then it was all about helping all y’all Yankees learn to speak and understand American…like I said, simpler times.

    But ultimately that farmer almost single-handedly created the Reagan Revolution (again, including me) and in many ways the country and the world hasn’t been the same since…as that time also included the rise of “modern” radical islam.

    And there’s another difference, important really only to old Flarduh Crackers like me; the Palm Beach Post is known now as one of the most radically leftist rags in the South, and even then it leaned that way due to the old-line retired New York Jews who so heavily populated Palm Beach County. But there was at least some even-handedness then too, and Steve Mitchell personified it. He was already semi-famous when I met him in ’78 at Mr. Bergeron’s pawn shop which I had just taken over management of at age 24, having spent the first six years of my marriage and working life as a sugar mill pipefitter and turbine operator in the whole ‘nother world of Western Palm Beach County. Steve was devastatingly brilliant and funny to the point of genius, and paired up with the equally brilliant home-grown Sam Rawls, chief cartoonist of the PB Post for many years, and the awesome illustrator for Steve’s books.

    Like many ultra-talented folks, Steve Mitchell had his demons, with booze being his most destructive. After a few unexplained absences from the paper, the editor finally admitted there were “issues” that Steve was dealing with. During one of those periods, he apparently tried to kill the demons, by killing himself, I believe around 1980. There’s an old truism that the lights that burn brightest often burn themselves out prematurely. I don’t know how accurate that is, or if there’s some inherent correlation between genius and self-destructive behavior, but it seems to me that’s what happened to Steve Mitchell.

    Anyway. A bit of a tangent, but still related to the topic at hand. If the lefties had been able to hire Mitchell to help them get their redneck on, we might have had a hard time ID’ing them and weeding them out. But while he might have ultimately destroyed himself, he would never in a million years have sold out his beloved American Hillbillies and Rednecks.

    https://www.amazon.com/Complete-How-Speak-Southern-ebook/dp/B0012T6O1W/ref=dp_kinw_strp_1

    • Thundercloud65

      Lewis Grizzard was one of those people whose light burned out far too early.

      He hated Oprah and Jeff Foxworthy. He said Jeff misrepresented Southerners.To Lewis a Redneck was a person like his grandpa who worked out in the sun from dawn until dusk.

      Grizzard wrote books with titles like;” I haven’t understood a thing that’s gone on since 1965.”

      • JTC

        Yep. LG was from the same mold as SM, I think it’s broken now. RIP to them both.

      • Interventor

        Loved Lewis. Lived in Hotlanta when he was alive.

    • NotYetInACamp

      It is an honor to be mentioned in the same comment as those greats.
      I suppose that like in the scene in Casablanca when Bogart and the Police Captain finish talking and the Captain says “Round up the usual suspects!”, then I shall be rounded up. WOO HOO!

  • Chris Muir

    JTC.Throttle back some.

    • JTC

      Hmm. Figured the Rawls connection would have been of interest, even a muse; sure beats G. Trudeau.

      But, no problem. Your space, your rules, which I assume apply to all of the umm…prolific, among us. 😉

  • Unfortunately the class will be yet another attempt to learn to talk to us, without a section on how to listen to us.

    • GWB

      DING!

    • Bill G

      Ayuh. Leftists feel no need to listen to their inferiors, and consider anyone not as far left as they are to be inferior.

      • Old Codger

        The only reason they lower themselves to speak to us is to correct our world view by converting us to “the truth” or “reality” as they think/conceive/believe/consider feel it to be.

        • Kafiroon

          Any of them can come and “explain” to me their enlightened view of everything. As long as they help me work while I listen… here, hold this wire for me just a minute.

          • NotYetInACamp

            Y’all are bad.
            I like that.

            ZAP!!!!

  • Pete231

    If Chuck Schumer had two brains, the other one would be lonely. He’s living proof that in-breeding is not the answer…

    • Deplorable B Woodman

      Ya tryin’ ta say he hasn’t even got one brain cell to rub together?

      • Spin Drift

        Chuckie Schmuckie is a single helix.

        Spin
        Department of Animal Husbandry

      • Old Codger

        I’m not entirely certain Chuckie (much less his niece) would know what to do with a boot full of piss even if you told him the instructions were printed on the sole.

  • Who determines who is a “true American”? How about those who believe in, stand for, and will defend those things which this country was built on and the Constitution?

    • Old Codger

      In other words, a “true American” is as a “true American” does. Contrary to leftist practice, actions trump ideology and substance trumps style just as our President continues to Trump the insidious activities of the left.

    • NotYetInACamp

      Progressives build the pen to control all.

      Americans are free range.

      We may build a pen for comfort or efficiency, but the gates swing open easily when an American enters or exits.

  • Neil Frandsen

    Grin. This Alberta Redneck (earned _mine_ on the top end of a hoe handle, cultivating weeds out, and hilling around Dad’s little winter-potatoe patch), remembers the Porcupine Hills rancher, who had a PhD in Geology, and a relative of his, who was counting cattle numbers, and writing up the tally in his notebook, while sitting on the corral-chute fence. Next to him was a Calgary Herald reporter, who was trying to keep up with the count, and losing ground… “However do you count all those Cows, Mr Burton?” she asked…
    “Easy, count the legs, and divide by 4!”, Pat replied, not missing a beast-counted, the while…

  • Bill G

    Machiavelli told his Prince that one effective way to rule a conquered country was to live in it.
    Can you imagine any of the Coastal Elites even considering that?
    And for now, at least, they’ve lost.
    Let’s hope Trump continues the way he’s started. He’s off to a great start by doing things he campaigned on.

  • IsaGuy

    As long as they keep talking “TO” people, they will fail.
    They need to talk “WITH” people and more importantly, Listen and Learn from those discussions.

    But, the hubris of the Leftist won’t allow that to actually happen. After all, they are smarter…in their own emotionally stunted minds.

  • noncom

    When I think of people from the South and their manners, politeness, and straight forward honesty, nobody embodies that more than my Grandfather on my Mom’s side….he chewed Red Man and Beech Nut, smoked Hav A Tampa Blunts, and had little to say, but when he spoke, people listened….he got up way before the sun every day of his life, either to milk the cows, plow the fields, harvest crops, or later, make it to his job at the water treatment plant…if he ever missed a day of work it was the time he stepped on a sting ray at the beach and almost died…our meals were always supplemented with whatever he and my uncle shot, and even though we were what you would consider poor by today’s standards, we didn’t know it then….it was the happiest time of my life living on that farm with my Aunts and Uncle, and growing up in the South….every time I hear Schumer with his stupid rants, it makes me want to slap him and grab the dueling pistols…ya’ll come back now, ya heah….

    • JonDeplorable

      The best part of dueling with Shumy wouldn’t be the inevitable outcome, but the preliminary round, where he loses his water and bowels simultaneously as you hand him his ‘yucky’ pistol. Ok, the ending would be fun, too.

  • WayneM

    There’s room for a line about the most dangerous location in Washington is between a microphone and Chuck Schumuppet but Harry Reid already used that one…

    • Interventor

      Many have said that of Cheesy Chuckie.

      • Old Codger

        “Cheesy Chuckie” – cute. Entirely apropos and yet still cute. Kudos

  • CaptDMO

    Who are real Americans?
    Start walking until you hear the phrase “These are not OUR values! This is NOT who WE are!”
    Chat with the OTHER person being “instructed”.

  • Pamela

    Oh hell. We’re being way too polite in dealing with these A-holes. I say we track them down, get them drunk and stoned, toss in some ED meds, some really nimble sweet young ladies and gents if any of them go that way, lots of Polaroids and see what happens. Put it on PPV.
    Might pay down the Debt that way. Well, maybe not so much.

    • NotYetInACamp

      Did you ever work for an “Intelligence Agency?”

      • Pamela

        NYIAC

        I have not now, nor ever been a sworn member, or in the employ of any Agency, either foreign or domestic. There were some I counted as friends and one lover.

        Now that I got that out of the way, I have a very vivid and rather mischievous imagination and sense of humor.

        I know all of the hard working every day Americans are tired of being treated as we are easily led around by the nose; and that we will believe anything they shovel at us, or buy the promise of I won’t come in your mouth by the damnable Liberals etc.

        A major reality check would be to vote them all out of office Nation wide and the fewking horses they rode in on. Then hold their replacements feet to the Constitutional fire of less is more.

        It would be fun to see how much debt could be paid down though.

        • NotYetInACamp

          As you wish.

          Good options.

          • Pamela

            Are you a fan of the Princess Bride?

  • Pamela

    Oh joy, while reading that I felt like I was attending a family reunion with all branches of the family. No wonder the Aunts kept the booze locked up.

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