That last line made this old retired Fart laugh. And I needed that.
Thank you, Chris.
Aliens are laughing over the Turkey in the Tesla, but if Elon were to send Hillary, they would consider it an act of war.
Also, Hillary! would be waiting for Elon when *he* got to Mars … 🙁
There are many many turkeys that need launching, one-way natch.
Sam, I can tell you are an engineer and not a business person…
Someone says, “I’ll give you a billion”, you take it THEN give up the recipe.
Agreed with TT though, as we’ve discussed before, sending these stiffs to Mars would really piss Marvin off…
Might induce him to bring the Illudium Pu-36 Explosive Space Modulator out of mothballs.
Hell-ary, upChuck, Pee-Lousi, Post Turtle Mitch, Noisome, all prior and current FiBbIe directors, all prior and current Do(i)J AGs, (etc)
To launch that many would exhaust the international supply of cooking oil. How can we open the petroleum reserves? Priority launch for the rezident(sic) of a certain white building in DC?
Ah, but that’s a Renewable Resource! Just squeeze more virgins named “Olive”!
Finally, the source of Unobtainium.
It’s hard to find virgins these days
We don’t intend for it to be a pretty process, just get used fry oil from the fast food restaurants.
You’re thinking too small here. Hit Vlad up for the spare Tsar Bomba he keeps at his dacha and detonate it in the depths of the DC subway system. See if you can send the whole rotten town on the same trip a certain manhole cover took, once upon a time …
Current theory is that the manhole cover was moving with such velocity that it vaporized in the upper atmosphere, like a meteor would during entry, since they can’t find anything in the possible orbit it would have established.
The problem with doing that to DC is, all that vaporized B.S. would have to affect the Ozone Layer…
Galactic EPA is in the office Mr Musk. No, they did not go through Security. Well they did but not exactly. I mean they really did go through them Sir. They say that you “Have some splainin to do?”
They may have to wait until a Mr, er, CAPTAIN John Carter, Prince of Helium, and Warlord of Barsoom has explained things to him…
Only catch could be the potential serious irreversible contamination of the unique martian planet and it’s environment.
After so many Arkancides and Benghazi and more, I would take no action against it. I have no duty to protect.
Unshielded re-entry would sterilize the payloads in fire. Should be no problem.
“Sorry sir we messed up our calculations and missed Mars.” “So where are the launched headed?” “Andromeda, sir.”
My thoughts exactly. No problem if you happened to overshoot Mars.
nobody said it would have to land…a high orbit should give a good enough view , just say it’s Haiti 😉
They all may be stiffs, but a number of minutes in LN2 should prelaunch prepare them for the violently boiling oil and launch.
The perfect preparation – the LN2 would turn all the liquids in their bodies to ice, and frozen liquids dropped into boiling oil is causing Sam’s launches.
You keep doing turkeys Sam! Land a few on the White House and Congress.
Don’t they already have enough turkeys in residence?
Send em, Elon. Big savings, delete life support!
On a more serious note… that Tonga explosion was probably augmented by water intrusion into the vent. I’ve see estimates of 53kft plume heights.
The propulsion mechanism is similar to Sam’s ballistic and sub-orbital turkey flinging.
They’ve rated the explosion at around 6Mt yield.
The Tonga volcano, or Sam’s turkey launches?
Tonga, but I’ve seen higher estimates.
and beautiful ‘Tonga sunsets’ around the world
not to mention a cloud of aerosols spreading around the world
but not to fear, only the emissions from manmade things count toward ‘gorebull warming’. A volcano spewing more out in a day than we do in a year just doesn’t matter.
Thanks Chris! Great job taking an odd idea and making a masterpiece out of it!
Now I wonder what would happen if Marvin the Martian and Marvin the paranoid android would ever meet?
The Martian would probably be depressed enough to use his A-1 Disintegrator Pistol on himself.
Either one would have me tending toward reaching for my DeLameter.
Just borrow Duck Dodger’s Disintegration-proof vest. It should be laying around somewhere….
Marvin already has “The Old Re-Integrator”.
On a different note I watched “Waters World” on FOX tonight. He had the best of his on the street interviews. How freaking stupid can the college students be. Hell I knew the answers to all the questions and I went to school in the 50’s through 61. Don’t they teach history any more? These asshat students don’t know shit! And they are in college? We are in trouble folks, big trouble.
Think: It ain’t the students’ fault, is it.
Unfortunately true. Their teachers are for the most part leftist ideologues who got their diplomas by parroting pious leftist cliches’ back at their own teachers, going back to the 1970s.
When “professors” think that all the answers are to be found in Marx and Marcuse, or now Kendi and DiAngelo, you can’t really expect their students to be an improvement.
Reminds me of a good insult:
“Were you born that stupid or did you have to go to college?
Remember, the campus radicals of the 60s are now running, and “teaching” ( read ‘indoctrinating’) at, today’s institutes of so-called higher education. Be afraid. Bevery afraid . . .
Dunno. You might find a lot of good answers IN Beverly DeAngelo…
There are some very high profile names one can reasonably suspect are “lurkers” here ………………………..?
Really? Come out of the shadows and ready yourself for launch* you ice cold evil hearted communist bytches!
*Or alternative methods of removal to take you -I mean us- out of our misery.
When`s the last time anyone heard the term
“Space Force” mentioned?
One of PDJT`s greatest accomplishments.
A bunch of wannabe ex USAF hacks seeking money.
This is what Marvin thinks of that idea Elon. It would not end well.
Going to Mars is a fool’s errand and a one-way trip with no coming back.
Please … by all means, send Hillary to the Angry Red Planet, along with The Squad, and all the rest of those Red Diaper Doper Babies infesting government, academia, the MSM, Big Tech, and whatever other dark crevices they congregate, plot and hide in.
The Angry Red Planet is well suited for these Reds … blast’em off and away … one-way tickets for the whole sorry lot and do not come back home.
“Going to Mars is a fool’s errand” Yeah, Elon is probably counting on a little help from his ‘friends’:
And we’ll have to foot the bill to attempt failed rescue missions.
Just a plug for Andy Weir’s book, ‘The Martian.’ Any book that starts off, “I’m pretty much fucked,” is okay by me. It is an excellent read and gives the reader chapter and verse on what surviving on Mars is like.
BTW, avoid the movie.
Something not discussed is all the blather about ‘life on Mars.’ We know there is frozen water there (polar caps anyone?). What no one talks about is what kind of organisms might lurk in the water and the quote from WO Ripley in ‘Aliens,’ IMHO, one of the best Sci-Fi films ever, applies;
“God damn it, that’s not all! Because if one of those things gets down here then that will be all! Then all this – this bullshit that you think is so important, you can just kiss all that goodbye!”
Be afraid, be very afraid…
Thanks Nemo : )
Well, I was hoping to see about 10+ flaming turkeys arcing down into and around the South Guest House like SMOD coming home to roost.
That’s not SMOD, it’s MIRV (Multiple, Independently-targeted Re-entry Vehicles).
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