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  • January 2, 2020 at 12:17 am
    JTC

    Was a time not too long ago, when every cop and kid dreamed of being a g-man. What a wound has been inflicted on our Republic that it is now an embarrassment and in a very real way has become the enemy within.

    On a brighter note, there’s my perky petite Suzy Q! Where ya been girl?

    Don’t know what happened to Skye’s feminist version of “hold my beer and watch this”. Yes I do, see Suzy above. She’s dumb but not that dumb. 🙂

    • January 2, 2020 at 3:00 am
      Jefferson A Selvy

      Only thing worse than FBI is BATFE, the only government agency to infringe upon the rights of citizens by design.

      • January 2, 2020 at 3:20 am
        Lifeofthe Mind

        BATFE, It’s the official one stop shopping convenience store.
        If only they also had a division supplying high speed watercraft.
        What? That isn’t their job?

      • January 2, 2020 at 4:44 am
        Bruce A. Frank

        . . .and ignore the real law breakers

      • January 2, 2020 at 7:54 am
        eon

        It really should be BATFET- Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives Taxation.

        It is the only Federal law enforcement agency which is primarily charged with collecting taxes on things. That was why it was originally at Treasury, as a sequel to the old Revenue Bureau for alcohol when Prohibition was repealed.

        It retains that taxation function today, even though Bush 43 moved it from Treasury to DoJ.

        Never mind that the Constitution specifically prohibits Federal “peace officers” from collecting taxes in any way. The Founding Fathers had had a bellyful of that with the King’s Inland Revenue service.

        So yes, throughout its existence, BATFET has operated in violation of Federal law. Which probably explains its corporate “attitude problem”.

        Once someone decides that they are the final arbiters of what “the Law” is, it tends to distort their worldview just a bit.

        clear ether

        eon

      • January 2, 2020 at 7:17 pm
        Henry

        Um, don’t forget the DEA and the DOT.

    • January 2, 2020 at 2:37 pm
      Bob in Houston

      Wasn’t she looking for Tucker rather than Travis?

  • January 2, 2020 at 12:20 am
    Too Tall

    Chris,
    You are beginning to resemble….Shakespeare.
    The more topical and timely your humor, the more it becomes wisdom for the ages.

    Skye,
    Get the to a nunnery….

    • January 2, 2020 at 12:37 am
      Pamela

      TT~ Are you trying to burn down the house?

      • January 2, 2020 at 12:54 am
        Too Tall

        Pamela,

        It is far more probable that the convent would burst into flames should Skye darken their door.

      • January 2, 2020 at 3:15 am
        OldGoat36

        Nunnery was not a convent, it was slang for a whorehouse. It is only today’s understanding of words which makes people think Hamlet meant convent.

    • January 2, 2020 at 12:47 am
      Deplorable B Woodman

      I thought it was “Hie thee to a nunnery”.

    • January 2, 2020 at 4:59 am
      Bill G

      She used to live as if she was part of one. The type the Bard was referring to, that is.

  • January 2, 2020 at 12:39 am
    interventor

    BTW, in anti-papist Elizabethan England, nunnery meant a house of ill repute.

    • January 2, 2020 at 2:41 am
      Pamela

      I didn’t know they came up with another name for Congress

      • January 2, 2020 at 1:12 pm
        John

        The word Congress does itself have multiple meanings.
        I for one think ours too closely resembles rape.

  • January 2, 2020 at 12:49 am
    Deplorable B Woodman

    I always call it/them (proper capitalization important, every other letter) FiBbIes, or “fib-bees”.

  • January 2, 2020 at 12:51 am
    Deplorable B Woodman

    They may have been terrible FiBbIes, but they can cook up some great BBQ and brisket.

  • January 2, 2020 at 12:52 am
    Too Tall

    Intervenor,

    For Skye’s sake, I meant the original meaning of the word.

    Besides, since no one is buying when she gives it away for free, how could she possibly sell it?

  • January 2, 2020 at 12:55 am
    Deplorable B Woodman

    Between Skye, Suzi Q, and Sam, I’m surprised no one has lost a shoulder strap (or two) yet. Ahhhhh, but the year is young, and I am patient.
    (say, am I noticing a pattern of “Esses” here? sounds like a snake convention, with a lisp)

  • January 2, 2020 at 1:30 am
    WayneM

    The skills that allowed Travis and Suzi Q to excel in their previous employment will serve them well in the future. As far as their alibis… it’s like they understudied under Comey himself…

  • January 2, 2020 at 2:32 am

    Where’s the sauerkraut? Gotta have the pork and ‘kraut on New Year’s Day. As a sausage topping counts. Don’t know if it qualified for Pamela’s “deep larder” but the roast I pulled out of the freezer was nearly at the third anniversary of the sell-by date, turned out great.

    It’s amazing how many journalists are depressed the Baghdad embassy attack wasn’t “Trump’s Benghazi” and the mourners protesters Iranian-backed militias were repulsed. There just aren’t enough Americans dying for good reporting.

    And after that massive disappointment of a church shooting, ABC’s Nightline is starting off the year with a show on some recent extremely bad police killings, Botham Jean “wrong apartment” and the October Fort Worth “woman shot through the window” incidents, to make their point that highly trained professionals screw up under stress so why would you think you’d do better, hayseed. Because nothing more newsworthy happened today, in Baghdad for example.

    • January 2, 2020 at 2:51 am
      Pamela

      My Dad’s Mom made sauerkraut and about 8 kinds of pickles. She brined and smoked her own hams and bacon, plus sausages. With the crop failures and other idiocy of late, stock up on staples for a deep larder. And grow your own.

      • January 2, 2020 at 2:58 am
        Jefferson A Selvy

        I’d cut a Fed’s throat for homemade garlic pickles!

      • January 2, 2020 at 12:28 pm
        Punta Gorda

        For an added treat, put a slice of habanero in your jar before you seal the dill with pickles when canning.

        That gives you a tart dill pickle that will bite back.

      • January 2, 2020 at 3:52 am
        NotYetInACamp

        That sauerkraut, pickles, and other good stuff like that were to a degree successfully used against the Spanish Flu pandemic, as well as being useful in curing people with the flu prior to antibiotics and such. A personal internal environmental change. Just a FYI the FBI hasn’t told you on such, should you need it in a future time. Hot peppers have their advantages too as food and digestive sanitizers. They keep you from getting sick at times.

      • January 2, 2020 at 3:55 am

        After examining the labels of numerous cans of fruit and fruit cups and finding they had ZERO nutrition except for a few with a little Vit C added, nothing but calories, I’ve taken to stocking canned tomatoes, V8, and Ovaltine. I’m looking at condensed tomato soup that’s 50% USDA Vit C per serving. Until I start drying rose hips and collecting white pine needles, those are things that’ll get me through the cold months until the various fresh fruits return.

        Although it would be nice if stores could sell frozen fruit that wasn’t “good for smoothies” because when thawed it becomes slimy mush only good for mixing in things like oatmeal.

      • January 2, 2020 at 6:28 pm
        Pamela

        Kadaka~ I make my own raisins and other dried fruits and veggies. Also freeze what I like to eat.

    • January 3, 2020 at 1:49 am
      WayneM

      Whenever I hear the word “sauerkraut”, I always think of Angela Merkel for some reason… Coincidence, I’m sure…

  • January 2, 2020 at 2:51 am
    Lon Mead

    https://youtu.be/TVC6wbWsq3I

    “Gonna need some more FBI guys, I guess.”

  • January 2, 2020 at 3:17 am
    Lifeofthe Mind

    A 20 year coma? Will we see a Men In Black tie in?

  • January 2, 2020 at 3:47 am
    NotYetInACamp

    Like the FB(***) cooked up any better in the coup against the USA and the US Constitution and the people.
    Pee party. Set ups galore. Steele document. FISA fizzes. The lying lovers and their infidelity. Comey. The top FBi brass. and so much more and we have not even touched the Anti State Department, the Wahabi CIA Chief, the deep throated state, the blackmailed Congress. There is so much more

    But they are good cooks. They don’t just cook up things. And their fibs do not hurt good people.

  • January 2, 2020 at 5:11 am
    Bill G

    This much scum doesn’t float to the top without the pond being full of it. There is far too much bureaucratic power concentrated in D.C. The idea of moving agencies out needs to be implemented. Diffuse the power base, and they cannot interact nearly a well. Some might even start to do their jobs, rather than boost their status.

    • January 2, 2020 at 8:18 am
      GWB

      There is far too much bureaucratic power concentrated in D.C.
      FIFY.

      And I don’t think you really want them to do their jobs, as their jobs are to make your life harder and less robust. No, we need to move them about only if the ultimate goal is to make it easier to get rid of them, entirely.

      • January 2, 2020 at 11:10 am
        cb

        Mandatory annual report of ‘$ wasted’ = reduce next budget by same amount + 5%. Sort of a reverse line item veto. Soon budget will = 0

    • January 2, 2020 at 10:12 am
      John D. Egbert

      Wouldn’t it be interesting if every Federal Department, Agency, Commission, Program, etc. – ad infinitum, as nauseam Amen – were to be bounced against the Constitution (as written and explained in the Federalist Papers) for justification citing Article, Section and Clause as to its/their continued existence. Immediate elimination of those which fail the test; nationwide dispersement for those that survive.

      Ah, well. One may dream . . .

      • January 2, 2020 at 10:25 am
        Kafiroon

        A nice concentrated EMP on the D(emotratically) C(ontrolled) environments shutting down, and better, wiping out all their information would go a long way to allowing us some freedom.

      • January 2, 2020 at 11:32 pm
        Jefferson A Selvy

        They’d all claim commerce clause. The most abused clause in the constitution.

    • January 2, 2020 at 10:39 am
      MasterDiver

      There are several deactivated military installations/training sites scattered around Alaska, the Dakotas, the Great Plains, and Pacific Territories. Not much social life, but they could focus on their REAL jobs. The old ABM site in Nekema, ND would be a good start.

      Zar Belk!

  • January 2, 2020 at 10:04 am
    Gus Bailey

    Chris,
    Gotta be honest. I like the more detailed shading of your later work; yesterday was an excellent example. Respect to the minimalist revival; keep up the good work.

  • January 2, 2020 at 10:45 am
    JTC

    Crisis averted at the US Embassy in Iraq.

    CIC DJT says, I want peace. While simultaneously ordering an Airborne Rapid Response team there and already dropping 100 heavily armed Marines into the compound.

    To which the Iran/Iraq terrorist scum said um, yeah we want peace too let’s bug the flick outa here!

    We’ve got us a real deal Commander in Chief. How critical is that we keep him, and what might this have led to if the Beast or any of the clowns been calling the shots?

  • January 2, 2020 at 11:09 am
    Sarge

    They still haven’t got used to a Commander in Chief with the stones to do the job he is supposed to… He is doing his job. It is up to us to do our job and get people put in Washington to represent us….

  • January 2, 2020 at 12:24 pm
    DogByte6RER

    The FBI cheats at cards too!

    Here’s a great column up today at The Federalist titled “It’s Statistically Impossible For The FBI’s Spygate Errors To All Be Mistakes” by Jason Beale (a nom de guerre).

    Read it at: https://thefederalist.com/2020/01/02/its-statistically-impossible-for-the-fbis-spygate-errors-to-all-be-mistakes/

    Happy 2020!

  • January 2, 2020 at 3:18 pm
    cb
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