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Because I Don’t Need to draw a Picture.

38 Comments

  • December 19, 2015 at 12:10 am
    Kafiroon

    Forgive me, but I Must point out that they are both a Farce.

    • December 19, 2015 at 6:45 am
      nonncom

      The farce is strong in both of them….

  • December 19, 2015 at 12:10 am
    HB

    Ol’ Paul RyNO….I hope his gets a lightsaber up his donkey!

    Ooooppps….Ozero already did it to him….and the US….unfortunatly.

  • December 19, 2015 at 12:23 am
    eon

    Never give him an advanced TIE. He’ll crash it for sure.

    cheers

    eon

  • December 19, 2015 at 12:36 am
    Greg B

    Stakes.
    Honey.
    Fire ants.
    Some assembly required.

    • December 19, 2015 at 5:41 am
      OpenTheDoor

      Better would be a dead chicken, let the traitor watch the assembly gather. Place him in a 6 sided cage, a la his Muslim friends, so he is afforded a front row seat. Sew the zipper on his orange jump suit closed with nylon thread so he cannot get it off. When the assembly of ants has gathered, tip the cage over on the chicken.
      Using a chicken assures just meat eaters are gathered for the feast, using honey will cost too much elbow room for the really nasty fire ants. No need for the sugar and piss ants.
      Yeah, I have worked it out.

      • December 19, 2015 at 5:42 am
        OpenTheDoor

        The best part, fire ants are immigrants too.

      • December 19, 2015 at 12:43 pm
        Otto Didact

        With fire ants you don’t need bait. Have the stakes ready. Kick the mound a couple of times. Then drop him over the now seething mound and tie wrap his wrists and ankles to the stakes. The stand back to watch the fun.

        After a few minutes you can take him off the ground and give him a couple of days for the little burning pustules to develop every place he was stung.

        After a couple of days repeat over the same mound. Should be able to keep him going a long time like this.

        (Yes, I know. I am not a nice person. Deal with it.)

  • December 19, 2015 at 12:50 am
    H_B

    I still remember my first impression when he appeared in the 2012 campaign: “Well, he certainly talks a good game and says all the bullet points I want to hear…but after all the RINOs we’ve seen I wonder what his real character is like? After all, Romney thinks he’s someone he can use and work with…”

    (I was living in MA at the time Romney was governor. I would have taken Gingrich, anybody, before Romney.)

    • December 19, 2015 at 7:14 am
      finebammer

      ha! I recall being told Gingrich was “unelectable”. then Mittens proceeded to step on his own dick throughout the re-coronation of Obama. now i’m being told the same thing about Trump, Cruz and others.

      the same voices who urged us to give them control of the House and Senate.

  • December 19, 2015 at 12:52 am
    Polly Cy

    Drat you, Chris, how dare you dampen my outrage by making me smile.

    • December 19, 2015 at 4:58 am
      H_B

      Can we have another “dumbest politician” quote?

      • December 19, 2015 at 12:22 pm
        Polly Cy

        I’m not sure which ones I’ve posted already. I started my academic life as a Sovietologist, so quite a few, including #7, come from the wacky world of the USSR and the “real” WTO (Warsaw Treaty Organization):
        “No, no, Ambassador Andropov is sitting here in my office, and he assures me it’s just a big misunderstanding.” November, 1956: Hungarian Prime Minister Imre Nagy to General Kiralyi as Soviet tanks rolled towards the Parliament building in Budapest. He refused to allow the general to announce the invasion or initiate defensive measures.

        Then there’s the honorable mention. I know that it’s verboten to criticize JFK, but his famous declaration, “Ich bin ein Berliner,” actually translates as “I am a jelly doughnut.” It should have been “Ich bin Berliner,” but the Germans, and for the most part, history, have been too kind to point it out.

      • December 19, 2015 at 12:45 pm
        Polly Cy

        PS – Some writers have tried to let Kennedy off the hook, saying that the indefinite article “ein” is only omitted when talking about profession or place of residence. But since Kennedy was declaring himself to be a “spiritual resident” of Berlin, I’m afraid that dog won’t hunt. What isn’t true is the story that the Germans laughed at the error or that it was mocked in the press afterwards.

      • December 19, 2015 at 1:01 pm
        H_B

        Thank you.

        #7: =O …yeah, that definitely deserves to be on the list. How does one “accidentally” get T-55s in your capital?

        Jelly Doughnut: I had a friend (who was politically active/aware very early) in high school who told me about that and mocked JFK for it. I’ve always found JFK to be overly-lionized and under-accomplished.

      • December 19, 2015 at 1:13 pm
        Polly Cy

        Maybe same way as all those British and American troops dressed up like Germans to invaded the USSR. At least according to Stalin – who insisted for days that Germany hadn’t really invaded, it was just foreign provocateurs trying to lure the USSR into a war. Did I post his response to Richard Sorge’s report on Barbarossa? It’s on my list, too.

      • December 19, 2015 at 1:25 pm
        H_B

        Before today, we’ve seen “Peace in our time”, “Hitler is a gentleman”, and #2 “Gentlemen don’t read each other’s mail” (don’t know what numbers the first two are.)

        Stalin for tomorrow then?

  • December 19, 2015 at 1:20 am
    epador

    Umm, shouldn’t O be BEHIND him if he’s in the “proper position?”

    • December 19, 2015 at 3:19 am

      Depends on how he’s going to take it.
      Probably not where he’s given it to us peons.

      • December 19, 2015 at 4:20 am
        RegT

        “O” stands for “oral”.

        I knew Ryan would be no better than Boehner. Except for not having to watch him cry. Although, given the opportunity, it would take me less than a minute to make him cry.

  • December 19, 2015 at 2:16 am

    Thank you for making this whole thing a bit more palatable, Chris. Your boost to my blood pressure medications is priceless.

  • December 19, 2015 at 4:21 am
    Tim Moyer

    Nice of Ryan to use Hitlery”s Tie fighter instead of Uber! Still reeling from Muslimstatistics.com I guess the Republicans ARE the New Republic after all. Disgusted with Ryan and WILL NOT vote for Hitlery and Uma hit squad. I can hear in the distance “General Order 66” already going out over the smartphones. (re-posted on FB) Thanks, Chris…….Sam still has her cast? Mmm, really had”t noticed, LOL 🙂

  • December 19, 2015 at 5:27 am
    Southpaw

    Not only is Paul Ryan a congressman of my state — Wisconsin — but he is the representative of my own district — the 1st. I have followed his career closely ever since he was elected at age 28, and this is right out of Invasion of the Body Snatchers. I never saw this coming. Don’t know what to say…

    • December 19, 2015 at 5:46 am
      OpenTheDoor

      A humble apology would suffice.
      We all get tricked, now, fix it.
      Don’t let him fool you twice.

  • December 19, 2015 at 7:01 am
    Bill G

    NSA/Homeland Security monitoring certainly can produce useful results.

  • December 19, 2015 at 8:22 am
    B Woodman

    Feed Lyin’ Ryan to the lions.

    That’s the best for humor I can come up with after this gooberment finance total surrender by the RINOcrats. Stick a fork in ’em. They’re done.
    (that, and it’s 0500, and no caffeine yet)

  • December 19, 2015 at 8:53 am
    Grunt GI

    Sadly. Just another case of Congresscritters doing what they do.
    Sigh, Chris can we have our swimming hole present soon?
    We need some holiday cheer and I don’t think my usual eggnog and Cap’n Morgan will be enough!
    -/:)

  • December 19, 2015 at 9:04 am
    clayusmcret

    Pelosi would have done us no worse that Ryan. Reid would have done us no worse than McConnell. And my former democrat senator would have done us no worse than my new republican senator. So much effort. So little return.

  • December 19, 2015 at 9:33 am
    Dread

    How have we bred a population of idiots who fall for this sheite time and time again? If there is no cure, no smart pill they can take, we are indeed doomed.

  • December 19, 2015 at 9:42 am
    Iconoclast

    As furious as I am about this betrayal (and others similar), there is this little voice in the back of my head whispering about blackmail, horse heads, alphabet agencies & conspiracies ….

    • December 19, 2015 at 12:53 pm
      Polly Cy

      Sadly, your little voice could be right. Maybe that’s why CBS hasn’t scheduled season 5 of Person of Interest yet. Too close to reality!

    • December 19, 2015 at 1:06 pm
      H_B

      I’ve been wondering about that since John Roberts did his judicial-behavior about-face.

  • December 19, 2015 at 10:19 am
    Pamela

    Well this proves the new guy’s set is the same as the old guy’s set.
    Lacking a pair. Sure proves that the critters were off lallygaging about when common sense and fiscal prudence were bestowed.

    They pass this pile of dung to have a budget in place and go home.
    Are there any expiration dates in the thing for certain items?
    As in item #????-??A is effective from 01-01-2016 12:01 am to 01-01-2016 12:02 am GMT.

    Amazon has these in stock-Shipwreck Beads Metal Brass Smooth Round Bead, 3mm, Metallic, Antique Brass, 300-Piece $6.60 prime. Two orders should cover it.

  • December 19, 2015 at 12:24 pm
    markm

    anonymitty: In response to yesterday’s post about the Iranian epic poem “Shanameh”, I would not take that as representative of Islamic _Arab_ culture in any way. Wikipedia spells it “Shahnameh”, and sometimes “Shahnama”. (There is no one right way to spell words when a different alphabet is rendered into the Latin alphabet, but since it translates as “Book of Kings”, I think the first syllable is properly spelled “Shah” like the Persian/Irani kings.) It’s set in pre-Islamic Iran and draws from Zoroastrian sources and possibly even earlier mythology, although in the final form it was written 3 centuries after the Muslim Conquest, by a man who was at a Shia Muslim (at least in public). Many of the Sassanid Persian/Zoroastrian virtues it celebrates are culturally universal, so I would not expect Arabs to publically decry them – but the emphasis and which ones are practiced only when convenient versus which ones people hold to even when it’s hard might be quite different.

    • December 19, 2015 at 1:03 pm
      Polly Cy

      Very informative – and quite right. Many of my middle Eastern students spell their own names differently from day to day. Makes just keeping a grade book a real adventure; imagine trying to vet them when they enter the country.

  • December 19, 2015 at 2:44 pm
    Arkelk

    “Then there’s the honorable mention. I know that it’s verboten to criticize JFK, but his famous declaration, “Ich bin ein Berliner,” actually translates as “I am a jelly doughnut.” It should have been “Ich bin Berliner,” but the Germans, and for the most part, history, have been too kind to point it out.”

    I read somewhere that it is a subtle distinction in German, that the text had gone through several professional translators at the State Department, and it wasn’t just something kind of remembered on the fly. The “ein” makes it metaphorical or subjunctive, not actual fact. A born and bred Berliner would not have used the article, someone wanting to have that status would.

    Kind of disappointed me, too, to learn that, as I think that JFK is over-rated. But it makes me appreciate the German language more.

  • December 19, 2015 at 3:17 pm

    Speaker Ryan deserves al;l the crap he is going to get for passing this piece of crap legislation.
    Thanks for telling it like it is Chris.

  • December 20, 2015 at 4:36 am
    NotYetInACamp

    Thus assures the rebellion.

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